I’m 50 and for the last eight and a half years I have focused every day on fitness.  It has consumed every moment of my days.  I have not worked out every day but I have thought about it every day.  I should be ridiculously skinny with the amount of energy I spend trying to figure out how to be a  better fitter me.  Now I am a person of faith.  I believe in Jesus and God and they have an importance in my life that I try to keep with me. I am not as faithful as I should be and definitely someone who needs forgiveness on the days I have forgotten to not let things get the best of me.  Recently I have stopped daily to give thought through an app to a bible passage to try and spend at least a moment every day thinking about how I can apply it on that day.  I have been touched by the faith of others that I have met and how openly devout they are.  Everything stems from their faith, drives their every action and interaction and they share it whenever they can.  It’s made me wonder if I can’t be more faithful and try harder.  It’s made me try to be above anger and hurt that I’ve felt recently to try to be above that reaction and look at it from another angle.  In a way, it’s made me stick up for myself and have the strength to not let things go that I have been too afraid to address.  I’ve been consumed with running away from many things but I’m in a place that feels like my focus needs to change.  I need to stay on fitness by working out several days a week and eating right but I feel it’s time to switch the balance of how much time I spend being a better Christian.  Feels like a crossroads but time will tell if it’s time to let go of anger and hurt and start healing from the inside out letting the Lord guide me.  I’m not sure how but I guess I’ll find out one day at a time learning as I go. Worrying less about what doesn’t matter and more on truly important things.