I have to keep reminding myself that this journey is not a sprint!  I am not in competition with anyone but myself and I’m NEVER going to look like a 20-year-old again.  Sad but true folks!  I have to remember to be proud of what I do get done in a day and not dwell on what I don’t.  I wrote a few months ago before I turned 50 that I wanted a nice ass, tight abs and something else.  I was on my way but had to cut back what I was doing because of a muscular issue causing me chest and abdomen pain.  No fix for that except doing less.   Since I cut down the weights it’s gone away thankfully but I now do no weights.  Part of that is life got busy and I opted not to go lift weights on those days.  I did do something but it was walking or running or biking instead.  All good things but not weight lifting.  I need to get back to it a little bit and I struggle getting in everything I want in a week.  I don’t have the hours to devote to that kind of fitness.  I also have this unrealistic goal in my head and it looms over me like a Dementor every day stressing me out.  That started June 25, 2011, and has never let me alone.  I always live with it and deal with it like I do Fat Brenna who runs behind me trying to catch up with me every day.  I won’t ever get rid of them and part of me doesn’t want to.  They drive me to keep going and do something over nothing but they are always making me feel this imaginary sense of emergency that I hate.  This is a Marathon and I’m in it for the long haul until I can no longer do it.  I need to accept what I can do and be happy with that because that is the key to a happy life or at least part of it.  Goals take time and sometimes more time than others.  You keep tweaking until something works and then make it your way of life and a habit to see changes.  You have to want to do it because trying isn’t going to get you there on the premise of your goal.  How bad do you want it?  Want it badly enough and you’ll get it.  Desire it a little and guess what?  You’ll never get there.  WANT IT!